Friday, July 30, 2004

'Squitos, 'squitos everywhere...

It seems that there's a lot noteworthy going on in my world today, so I thought I'd document it for prosperity.

  • I met Sam Roberts in the change room at a downtown store during my lunch hour. He asked to the seal of approval on a shirt he was trying on, and I gleefully gave it. Maybe he'll be wearing it when I go to his K-Days show tomorrow night? I'm not a huge Sam Roberts fan, but meeting a celebrity on your lunch hour is always enjoyable.

  • Upon walking through Commerce Place, I stumbled upon a blood donor clinic that had been set up for the day. This, however, is not the exciting part. The reason that I am writing this is to note that I am *still* unable to give blood. They don't want it. I'm horribly, horribly flawed. Or something.

  • I went to my favourite sandwich place (again) for lunch. Yesterday, the woman at the till noted that my sandwich had no vegetables, then remarked that it was as light as I was. Today, the sandwich guy made me a little cucumber flower to go on top of my sandwich. I find that prettier cucumbers are much tastier than ugly ones.

  • I spent much of my morning cutting up MPs. It was quite relaxing, since I was on the phone with several MLA's offices while I was doing it.

  • I have somehow been drawn into the Hack Club 7 e-mail circle du jour. It is...scary. But to respond: yes, you are correct Mustafa. When sucked into HackWorld, one does strange things.

  • I'm going to the fish store tonight with the ever-obliging boyfriend. We're definitely not buying anything since the newest tank refuses to cycle (nevermind if you don't already know what I'm talking about), but we're debating between picking up a pitbull pleco or some more cories.
  • As mentioned earlier, I'm going to K-Days tomorrow...for the first time. Ever. I'm not sure whether I'm supposed to be excited or not, considering that I've been to the Conklin thing in Winnipeg about a billion times...maybe Conklin turns out differently in Edmonton?
  • This morning went by kind of slowly because I didn't have my usual back-and-forth going with Ms. Janet Lo. Where are you, Janet? I'm bored...

Liberated at 1:31 p.m.

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Tuesday, July 27, 2004

Whee...apartment hunting!!!

For reasons that may or may not be discussed at a later date, it seems that I may be in the market for a nice, shiny, new apartment! Now, keep in mind that I've never managed to do anything in order...it'll prevent those suspicions of complete and utter insanity as you read through this post. The fact that I'm totally irrational may or may not play into this story...

Last Thursday, I decided that the *possibility* of having to move was more than enough for me to start booking appointments at show suites throughout Edmonton, and possibly North America (excluding Mexico). From all of these wonderful little jaunts into show suites around the world, I've narrowed it down to two buildings (but keep in mind I may not be moving anywhere. Ever.) However, being the horribly indecisive person that I am, I need some help in making that pseudo-final decision.

Here's what you need to know:

Apartment A:
- 1 block from the LRT
- In-suite washer and dryer (!!!)
- Pool, exercise room, sauna
- Dishwasher
- Across the street from a grocery store
- A little grubbier than Apartment B (but not objectionable)
- Big balcony

Apartment B:
- 2 blocks from the LRT
- Hot tub, sauna, exercise room
- Dishwasher
- Across the street from a grocery store
- Nicer, cleaner, classier than Apartment A
- Bigger balcony with slightly nicer view

Now here's the complicated part... The rent for a one-bedroom in Apartment A varies within an $85 range, while the range for renting a one-bedroom in Apartment B is $95. Apartment A starts @ $20/month more than Apartment B [this is starting to sound like one of those horrible math logic games...]. So if I get offered an apartment that's in the bottom end of the range of one building versus the top end of the range in the other, the decision is pretty much made for me (the top rents for both are kind of pushing my budget). If, however, I get offered an apartment in both buildings that are around the same price in rent, I may actually end up being able to decide between the two of them (and we're assuming, here, that I'm actually moving to begin with).

So? Which apartment would you recommend and why? Comment away!

P.S. I was going to make a poll, but I'm too lazy. Apologies...

Liberated at 3:01 p.m.

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Monday, July 26, 2004

By the way...

Now that I've been outed and all, I threw a few bloggy links into my sidebar. If you're not there...no whining. Just send off a comment, or email, or (ooh! foreign concept!) talk to me and I'll add you in...

Liberated at 2:34 p.m.

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Thursday, July 22, 2004

With my morning coffee...

I had the pleasure of watching this.

I'm pretty sure that almost everyone has seen this, but in case you haven't, I thought it post it...

 

 


Liberated at 11:26 a.m.

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Wednesday, July 21, 2004

Well, shit...

It seems that I've been discovered. 

Although I've managed to go five months (almost exactly) without being outed, it seems that my run of covert blogging has come to an end.  And I'm still waiting to find out exactly how it happened...Mssrs. Tam, Kawanami and Abboud, I'm looking at you.

I would still like to note however, that I'm still anonymous to the...'real' (?) world.  My name has not yet made it onto my blog, and I intend to keep it that way.  At least I can still grasp at that...

Am I expected to have important things to say now?  Oh, the pressure...




Liberated at 8:20 a.m.

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Sunday, July 11, 2004

I suppose that this is the result of having too much time on your hands...

From http://dept.physics.upenn.edu/~heiney/jokes/barbie.html

Archaeology 'r' Us
[from Sarah Gibson via Peter Stephens]

There is a nut who digs things out his back yard and sends the stuff he finds to the Smithsonian Institute, labeling them with scientific names, insisting that they are actual archeological finds.

The following is a letter the Smithsonian Institute sent as a reply to one submittal (this guy supposedly really exists and does this in his spare time):

-------------------------------------------------------------------

Paleoanthropology Division
Smithsonian Institute
207 Pennsylvania Avenue
Washington, DC 20078

Dear Sir:

Thank you for your latest submission to the Institute, labeled "211-D, layer seven, next to the clothesline post. Hominid skull." We have given this specimen a careful and detailed examination, and regret to inform you that we disagree with your theory that it, represents "conclusive proof of the presence of Early Man in Charleston County two million years ago." Rather, it appears that what you have found is the head of a Barbie doll, of the variety one of our staff, who has small children, believes to be the "Malibu Barbie". It is evident that you have given a great deal of thought to the analysis of this specimen, and you may be quite certain that those of us who are familiar with your prior work in the field were loathe to come to contradiction with your findings. However, we do feel that there are a number of physical attributes of the specimen which might have tipped you off to it's modern origin:

  • The material is molded plastic. Ancient hominid remains are typically fossilized bone.

  • The cranial capacity of the specimen is approximately 9 cubic centimeters, well below the threshold of even the earliest identified proto-hominids.

  • The dentition pattern evident on the "skull" is more consistent with the common domesticated dog than it is with the "ravenous man-eating Pliocene clams" you speculate roamed the wetlands during that time. This latter finding is certainly one of the most intriguing hypotheses you have submitted in your history with this institution, but the evidence seems to weigh rather heavily against it. Without going into too much detail, let - us say that:
    - The specimen looks like the head of a Barbie doll that a dog has chewed on.
    - Clams don't have teeth.


  • It is with feelings tinged with melancholy that we must deny your request to have the specimen carbon dated. This is partially due to the heavy load our lab must bear in it's normal operation, and partly due to carbon dating's notorious inaccuracy in fossils of recent geologic record. To the best of our knowledge, no Barbie dolls were produced prior to 1956 AD, and carbon dating is likely to produce wildly inaccurate results. Sadly, we must also deny your request that we approach the National Science Foundation's Phylogeny Department with the concept of assigning your specimen the scientific name "Australopithecus spiff-arino." Speaking personally, I, for one, fought tenaciously for the acceptance of your proposed taxonomy, but was ultimately voted down because the species name you selected was hyphenated, and didn't really sound like it might be Latin. However, we gladly accept your generous donation of this fascinating specimen to the museum. While it is undoubtedly not a hominid fossil, it is, nonetheless, yet another riveting example of the great body of work you seem to accumulate here so effortlessly. You should know that our Director has reserved a special shelf in his own office for the display of the specimens you have previously submitted to the Institution, and the entire staff speculates daily on what you will happen upon next in your digs at the site you have discovered in your back yard. We eagerly anticipate your trip to our nation's capital that you proposed in your last letter, and several of us are pressing the Director to pay for it. We are particularly interested in hearing you expand on your theories surrounding the "trans-positating fillifitation of ferrous ions in a structural matrix" that makes the excellent juvenile Tyrannosaurus rex femur you recently discovered take on the deceptive appearance of a rusty 9-mm Sears Craftsman automotive crescent wrench.

    Yours in Science,
    Harvey Rowe
    Curator, Antiquities



    Liberated at 8:14 p.m.

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    Tuesday, July 06, 2004

    From my favourite read, The Hill-Times

    Campaign 2004's liveliest moments of media coverage
    By Tom Korski

    Campaign 2004 soon will be reduced to harrowing flashbacks of campaign buses and stale doughnuts. While the wounds are still fresh, let's preserve the liveliest moments of media coverage this political season.

    Most Ominous Campaign Development
    New Brunswick Conservative Bob McVicar was waving at rush hour drivers in Saint John when a five-vehicle pileup snarled traffic. One car careened into McVicar's campaign van. "I don't think our presence caused the accident," he told the CBC. Three days later, McVicar lost his riding by 3,500 votes.

    Most Quotable Quote From a Leader
    "I mean, there are a lot of other things in life which I could not do...I never contemplated political life as a full-time career," said Paul Martin, in an interview with the Ottawa Citizen's Mark Kennedy.

    Most Quotable Quote From a Candidate
    "Well, I haven't been thrown out of any place of cursed or had my literature torn up, so I take that as a good sign," said Saskatchewan New Democrat Earl Cook, to the Meadow Lake Progress. Cook polled third in his Churchill River riding.

    Most Dubious Campaign Spin
    The London Free Press reported that Martin, as a typical working man, once "found a job pouring concrete." The Toronto Star told readers that Martin was so fascinated with construction work his "ultimate ambition" was to operate a backhoe, and that his favourite food was Kraft Dinner. Martin, one of the wealthiest Prime Ministers in Canadian history, is worth an estimated $70-million.

    Most Curious Campaign Prophecy
    "Martin now resembles Trudeau in 1968 - minus the charisma," veteran CBC journalist Larry Zolf wrote in a commentary. "Martin is indeed incomparable," Zolf added.

    Strangest Controversy
    North Nova Scotia MP Bill Casey refused to appear at an all-candidates' forum in Amherst, N.S., in protest over the location - the town undertaker's. "I'm willing to debate anyone, anywhere at any time, but not in a funeral home," Casey told the Amherst Daily News. He won re-election by 9,400 votes.

    Best Reason to Get a Thesaurus
    In a breathless June 10 story headlined "Liberals Admit They're Desperate," the Star used the word 'Desperate' five times in 15 paragraphs.

    Most Curious Headline
    In a column four days before the election, the Toronto Sun's Peter Worthington cited an online straw poll that gave Conservatives 51 per cent support. The column's headline: "An Upset in the Making?"

    Most Poignant News Writing
    From an account of Joe Clark's farewell speech to the House of Commons, by The Canadian Press' Sue Bailey: "'Maureen and I look forward to the next chapters in our lives,' Clark told a sparse crowd of MPs surrounded by rows of empty seats."

    Least Useful Commentary
    Astrologist Eugenia Last, appearing on CTV's Canada AM, told viewers that Martin "doesn't have the planet Neptune in an awkward position on this chart."

    Least Useful Interview
    The Charlottetown Guardian conducted a survey of local hairstylists and found "disillusionment and even disinterest among the electorate" as detected by P.E.I. barbers. "They have no idea how they're voting," one told the Guardian.

    Most Obliging Coverage
    The Fort Saskatchewan Record has this account of an all-candidates' forum: "MP Ken Epp was next to have opening remarks and he surprised many with his honest remark that he had in his own estimation represented the constituents of his riding of Elk Island 'to the best of my ability although not to perfection.'" Epp was re-elected by a margin of 16,000 votes.

    Most Over-Heated Editorial
    "To the question: 'What kind of Canada do we want,' [Martin] offers this answer: A kinder, healthier one that cares for children and the needy and helps mend a broken world, without being financially irresponsible. There's vision here," according to the Star, June 4.

    Most Intriguing Concept
    The National Post on April 14 quoted a geophysicist who warned that if a kilometre-wide meteor were to strike Ottawa, a fireball would rise over the city, incinerating the lawns of Parliament and causing the House of Commons to tumble into a smoking crater.

    Worst Campaign Joke
    Speaking in Fredericton, Stephen Harper said retiring MP Elsie Wayne reminded him of his "late great" Aunt Estelle - "except for the being dead part." Harper's quip was greeted with a gasp from "400 startled partisans" at a Conservative rally, according to the Canadian Press.

    Most Overplayed Story
    Olivia Chow's failed candidacy in Toronto's Trinity-Spadina prompted national coverage of a "power couple" in the Commons. CTV News predicted it would "add some spice to the upcoming election." The Globe and Mail reported that Chow "should help the NDP more successfully tap ethnic support from communities such as Chinese-Canadians."

    Most Underplayed Story
    Citing a "dramatic shift in the odds," an online bookmaker BetWWTS announced June 27 the chances of a Liberal minority had improved to 5 to 7.

    Liberated at 9:44 a.m.

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